Memories

 Get in the car again with that demonic spirit-stepdad. Last time when my sister was going on a trip and he complained that I was going into the car. I also lost sleep that night!

 Put myself in a situation again-where my stepdad can ask me aggressively for money. Don't go on any holidays with them. Avoid any confrontation/arguments with him. Avoid at all costs any interaction with him@

 Greece and Romania. I see period as a protection to stop anything from happening. I'm happy I gave myself to you. I was ill in Greece plus period- it was a double whammy. Romania was the worse as I had not packed any pads and they only sold the small ones so I had to plaster on loads. I was in such panic mode. Oh my goodness.

 I got my nails done in acrylics for Jamaica and I painted them pink and added gems onto them lol 

 He did listen to me when I needed someone to talk to the most but I took it for granted. I hurt others around me.

 If he treats u as good as me or better than me, then stay. If he treats u worse, then walk away.

 With Ty was not protected. My mom and stepdad was involved and i would get teased at home. Currently: Ty has gone and we have no contact!

 What Ty needed, but I ended it anyway!

 I didn't have sex in J.A

 Was the beach and the YS Falls.

 Not really but he wanted me to fly back and stay with him. And that's when I wanted someone in Europe and chose a wrong guy.

 Jamaica killed my cold as soon as I got in the hot heat.

 The internet being really bad in Jamaica. Also connecting with Ty made me go back home and make up with Samina and apologise to her.

 Getting glammed up for Jamaica. Ends of hair dyed, hair permed. I remember getting glammed up for work with a high hun, black blouse and wet look leggings and a silver choker and purple MAC instigator lips. I looked and felt good. I missed elements of those days!

 Tyrone did make me happy. He complimented me a lot. I do remember it feeling like a fairy tale of some sort. I was swept off my feet.

 In Jamaica and took lots of pictures. Maybe one day I should get them printed.

 That we were staying in someone's house in Jamaica. I prefer staying in a hotel. I feel more comfortable that way- to roam around, have a bath and etc.

 Wearing my going out clothing in Jamaica. Most of the stuff was from  work or Missguided. It made it so much easier when my clothes was from work.

 Daydreaming about you at work; Yearning for you. Knowing full well that I wouldn't be able to see your face, To hold you or kiss you once again. My heart screamed. 🖤 but to this colour 💔 I hated when you would constantly remind me about us. I just couldn't be stuck in past reminiscing about us. I just wanted to move on!

  Summer lipstick: For Jamaica, I had my Summer lipstick, which was MAC candy yum yum. I always loved getting a MAC lipstick. It was a treat. My hair was bleached blonde on the ends. So the pink was for the Summer and MAC instigator was for the dark winter. I loved it! I missed that: Wearing beautiful makeup on the evening shift. It made me feel like I was going out. You would see the customers come in sometimes to get their outfits. It reminds me: I need to get my ribbed leggings hemmed.

Jamaica: My stepdad aggressively asked for more money from me. When I was in the rented car with him and my mom. And I think it was wrong of him to ask for more money from me. Especially how I had only worked a part-time job and I don't get how so much money had to cover the cost of staying in his Mom's house. And my Mom let him do that aswell. Dad: It was paying for vd.

 It's so annoying when you get your period on holiday.